I am the Mom of a toe walker

James took his first steps when he was 13 months old. It was freakin' adorable. He was a chubby little guy and I was so excited about this milestone. And as you can see in the video, he is an eager and wobbly heel-to-toe walker. Super cute I might add.

Here's a video from 2009 right before his 2nd birthday. Still walking, marching, dancing heel-to-toe.

Things changed when he was about 3 years old.

When I took him to the doctor for a well-check, the doctor asked me if I had any concerns and I mentioned the toe walking. Next thing I know, we are in Physical Therapy for a year. And a year later, still toe walking.

I had a friend with a macabre sense of humor who would constantly ask about my "autistic son". She could find the funny in most things like fatal car accidents and kidnappings. I didn't care that my son might be mildly...whatever. I didn't seek out a diagnosis for it though. He was developing fine in all other areas and, frankly, I was tired of thinking about it. He could get from point A to point B. Success! However...

He is 6 1/2 now and still walking on his toes and showing no signs of stopping. He couldn't care less. But I have noticed that he is kind of off-balance when he is on his toes. He gets wobbly just walking around the house. He falls. On level ground. He even walks on his toes in his Crocs or tennis shoes. He doesn't play tennis. I am from the South. We call them tennis shoes. Actually, it's pronounced "tenny" shoes. If you are not from the South, these are known as sneakers or gym shoes or running shoes.

James can stand flat-footed. He can hop on one leg. He did that for an entire week once. Just hopped around the house. Hopped in place. Nutty. He has mastered his Razor scooter which requires him to stand with one flat foot on the scooter and push with the other. He was even confident enough to try it with his "unnatural" side. Woopsie Daisy!! Almost went down! Great recovery though. Now, riding a bike. That's a whole 'nother story. The bike is his enemy. The bike is not fun. The bike is hard. No thanks, he says. Bribes don't work. We thought a little bit of shame might work. "Hey James. You know "J" can ride his bike without training wheels and he's just 5." His response is typical of a spirited (total euphemism for defiant) child, "Well I am bigger than him and he cries to his mama. Whaaaa!!" Ooooo K. I was fresh out of ideas and then I thought I might reason with him. I know, right. Too simple to work.

He came to wake me up this morning. Remember, I work until midnight during the week. I have THE cutest toe walking alarm clock ever. "Mommy, you ready to go downstairs?" As I sat on the floor to put on my wig-wam slippers I started to tell James about searching the internet at work and reading about toe walking. I was met with silence but rapt attention. And good eye contact. That was promising. So I kept talking.

So what I found out is that you are an idiopathic or habitual toe walker. That means that when you started walking you walked heel-to-toe. It wasn't until later that you started walking on your toes. And I think I know why. You figured out that if you stood on your toes, you could SEE things. You could see what was on the kitchen counters. The kitchen table. You could reach into the refrigerator. And you just never stopped. It became a habit. 

At this point I thought he would say something like, "That is so cool Mom. Thanks for enlightening me." But no. He just stared at me. Silently. James is rarely silent. This must be a new method of confusing me. Little did he know that I would take it as encouragement to keep talking!

There's nothing wrong with you. Lots of kids walk on their toes but they usually stop by age 5 or so. The only problem I see with it is that you are off-balance when you are on your toes. Things might be easier for you if you did things flat-footed. I know some stretches we can do to help that. Your calf muscles are probably pretty tight so you need to stretch them out. 

Nothing. Left me hanging. Just, "Let's go downstairs now".

Regardless, I need (and want) to make this a priority. In some of the information I scanned, I came upon kids who are now adults that were or are still toe walking. Some said they wished their parents had been more proactive in helping with it. They were adding these comments in forums where parents were corresponding about what to do. I don't want him to feel that it holds him back for anything he wishes to do. He has always been big for his age (90th percentile since birth!) and that might be part of the problem. Poor guy, when we bought him his first bike, we had to get the 18" size because that is what fit him. But he was 4 and his body just didn't have the physical coordination to manage a bike that size. It was a bummer that we couldn't get him a smaller one. It would have been easier to handle. It was the same way with the tricycle. He outgrew it before he mastered it.

He'll be a late bloomer as far as coordination goes. I keep reminding myself that I am athletic and fairly coordinated and his Dad is/was athletic and probably more coordinated than me. He played goal keeper on semi-professional teams. Run. Jump. Dive. Throw. Kick. Taunt. Me? I ran in circles. Well, it was actually an oval. No hurdles to flail over. No high jump or long jump because this white girl cain't jump. I mean, I leaned forward over the finish line once and ended up flat on my back after a fantastic somersault.

If a child is a habitual toe walker, it's typically not from some underlying neurological reason so the options for treatment are less evasive than what I read about. I'm talking about leg braces to be worn all day and even overnight, surgery to elongate calf muscles, Botox injections to weaken the muscles so they can't stand on their toes. NO surgery. I won't do Botox myself so I wouldn't do that for my son either. Not for this. Most likely not ever.

I found this website which I loved to pieces. Fun stretches to do with kids. See also a blurb about special shoes. Shoes that are rigid that can make it hard to toe walk. Cool skateboarding shoes. Sketchers has some cool-looking ones and Target sells Shaun White skateboard shoes. It's about time for new shoes.

One of my favorite comments on one of the forums was from an engineer  Here's what he had to say:

toe walking is how the human body was designed to move. if you look at it from an engineering perspective, there is no shock absorption from your heel hitting the ground first except for your joints...which were not designed for that. knee, hip, lower back all receive g-shock with each foot step. toe walking allows the shock to be absorbed by the calf muscle, transmitting a negligible amount to the rest of the body. zero compared to heal walking. it requires more energy than heel walking, is difficult or impossible to maintain in most shoe types, and as most organisms prefer to use as little energy as possible, tends to fall by the wayside later in life in preference for heel walking as well as conformity. if you're a toe walker, as the saying goes-yer doin' it right.

I know he is not a doctor but I appreciated his analysis and his "don't believe the hype" encouragement.

I am the Mom of a toe walker. But he is so much more than that. He is a whole person. He is loved and cherished. And, really, when you're playing Minecraft, it just doesn't matter if you walk on your toes or not!