My boy is no longer a baby

James turned 7 yesterday.  He had a great birthday party. We had a bunch of wild and sweet boys playing in our above ground pool and having water balloon fights. It was a shark - themed birthday party complete with a shark cake and a shark tooth necklace for everyone.

Prior to the big day, I was having a hard time with it. James no longer looks like a baby. If it weren't for still having almost all his baby teeth, people would think he is older than seven. He hasn't wanted to hold my hand in public anymore. He pulls his hand out of my grip when I have made to hold his hand.

This is the year we have also to declare our intent to homeschool because he is now seven. So many big boy things to come. More academics to add to our schedule. No longer making sure he has a solid foundation in the basics like reading and writing and math. We will tackle science and history and I am developing a boy's book club for the Fall.

So, time marches on. No more little hands to hold. No younger sibling to ease me into this.

However,  and on the bright side ('cause there always is one) I am the only female in the house and I get lots of love at home. James will plop his big self on my lap every so often to watch a show. He still cuddles in the mornings. And just the other day, as if he knew I needed it, he grabbed me around my waist and said, "I love you so much Mommy". We were at Target. A public place. And we weren't in the toy department. I stopped everything and squeezed him back. He still calls me Mommy. Ahhhhh.

For soon, he will be bigger than me. I fully expect him to be as tall as me when he's 10. And then he will be bigger. All of him. His feet. His hands. He will tower over me.

Until then, a new phase of our relationship develops. One where he is my protector against big cats in his heroic fantasies. He hold the cat's jaws wide open so I can run away to safety (and call 911) then he pokes him in the eye. Apparently this is a huge deterrent for big cats.

I love my boy. I love this crazy journey of parenthood.  And I love the private cuddles and the peace that comes with knowing ain't no big cat gonna get me!!

Hello, My name is Connie and I can't stop reading.

I used to believe that I was never an avid reading as a child. I mostly remember being outside playing with my sister and the other kids in the neighborhood. All. The. Time. But when I really thought about it and tried to remember what I read, I had a longer list than I realized.

• Weekly Reader books (sent to the house monthly but I really only remember trying to read The Ghost of Windy Hill)
• Sweet Valley Twins series (high school)
• Most of Maya Angelou's books (college)
• Jack Kerouac books (college)
• Charles Bukowski (college)
• Toni Morrison books (college)
• Gone with the Wind (grad school)
• East of Eden (grad school)
• Lord of the Rings trilogy

And many others. I had decided to read some of the classics after high school because I never really read any. And by classics,here is a list what I mean: A Thomas Jefferson Education. Oh sure, we read Julius Ceasar and MacBeth. How to Kill a Mockingbird. But my teachers taught them because it was part of the curriculum and not because they loved them, with one exception. My senior year in high school, Coach Tesh taught MacBeth. He loved that play. We spent so much time on it because he loved it. We squeezed every once of interest from it that I got a 100% on the test. His love for it made me, at the very least, like it. He gave me a silver dollar for being one of a handful of kids in the class to ace that test. I still have it.

A "classic" is a work that's worth returning to over and over again because you get more from it each and every time.

I have become an avid reader over the years. I am NEVER without a book (or books) downloaded to my Kindle. Before that it was actual books then my Nook. I have read hundreds of books. Not all classics and not all worthy of a second read. But I read. Everyday. All the time. Lately, I feel like it has become a problem. I don't' want to stop. And now that summer is here, I want to sit and enjoy book after book. I keep hoping that my love of books will rub off on James. He will read the Diary of a Wimpy Kid books, Berenstein Bears books and some hero graphic novels on his own. He also has totes around his mythical creature book and gets two magazines in the mail. Any chapter books he has, we read together. I am sure that I will read aloud to him until he is a teenager if he wants me too. 

 I am reading 2 books about education so I won't feel so guilty about my "pleasure" books. I am seeking balance in my life between my love of books and life in general with my sweet boy and the responsibilities that come with being a mom, wife, homeschooler, interpreter, neighbor and friend.

While attending the North Carolina Home Educator's conference in May,  I went to at least two presentations about boys and academics. From that I learned about 2 great books that I am reading right now.

• A Thomas Jefferson Education: Teaching A Generations of Leaders in the 21st Century
• Boys Adrift: Five Factors Driving the Growing Epidemic of Unmotivated Boys and Underachieving Young Men

The more I read about the developmental differences between boys and girls, the more likely I am to seek out academic groups and activities that are just for boys. Or at least geared towards boys. For example, I am working on developing a boys-only book club with titles chosen that are about a boy(s) or is interesting to boys. I am also seeking activities (like soccer) that are not co-ed. The soccer league that James has played in for the last two years is co-ed all the way to the teenage years. As much as I loved that league, I want him to play on a boys-only team. Also, after reading the chapter about plastics in the Boys Adrift book, I went to Amazon and ordered glass food storage containers and threw out all my plastic. I also ordered a metal water bottle for James. Yes, that chapter was a serious eye-opener that moved me to action. 

In a nutshell, I love books. I love to escape and I like learning how to be a better parent and homeschooler. I like being informed. So, for now, I will continue to enjoy my fun books AND my "learning" books. James and I will finish reading his Magic Treehouse books and hopefully start a new one together. Reading is FUNdamental!!

Brainy and Introverted??

This is an revised post. 

I think this author might actually have met James before! I got this from a Babycenter.com article about spotting your grade-schooler's hidden talents:

Your child talks nonstop

Your chatty kid may have an advanced vocabulary, concoct elaborate stories, and make few grammatical or pronunciation errors, says Judy Galbraith, author of You Know Your Child Is Gifted When… She may also talk very fast and often doesn't stop until she's asleep. She wants to have the last word in every argument.

Gratitude and Random Observations in my Life

It's been a wild and crazy Fall season so far and the Christmas holiday is now upon us. Writing a blog is difficult to do sometimes because there is so much going on in life and inside my head that finding time to sit down and work it all out seems nearly impossible. But lists are manageable. I like lists. Very much. So here goes my attempt to share things that I am grateful for and some random observations I want to record for the ages.

Homeschooling

1. I have discovered over the past months that James really LIKES handwriting. I was so worried that he would dread it and I was mentally prepared for that to be our struggle. Nope. Not even close. Wanna know what he groans about? Math! I take some of the busy work out of it by writing for him. He counts and builds large numbers with the blocks and I write down his answer on the worksheet. I even color the blocks. I just want him to think about counting and not missing numbers and now focus on addition and building numbers. He counted to 100 the other day! It was a wonderful experience to see him working hard to do it. 
2. James loves the word games we play. He is developing pre-reading skills and he likes the word games where he gets to talk (his words). In the beginning, he struggled with understanding rhyming words and so he started thinking up pairs of words he thought rhymed. So, since about September, he will randomly say to me or Chris, "Hey! Tree and bee rhyme!" as an example. 
3. James read a new word the other day from the TV! We were watching "The Incredible Hulk" (the 1970's show) and he saw G-R-I-F-F on a tombstone and asked, "Does that say Griff?". I couldn't believe it!!! 
4. James is just now (like in the past week and a half) starting to draw. I have Nana to thank for that. She sends James that great magazine Ranger Rick Jr. (formally known as My Big Backyard). Each issue has a page of drawings that kids have submitted...and they are all his age. He is very interested in knowing the ages of the kids and what they have drawn. It's been a great influence. 

Raising Boys

1. I've been doing a lot of reading about raising boys and parenting in general. A couple of them seem to contradict each other but when reading these books, I have to be aware of what I already know about my child and what will and won't work. That Love and Logic book will not work right now. I know this after reading Beyond Time Out From Chaos to Calm I realized that I need James to do as I say. If it's 40 degrees outside and he is refusing to put on a coat, then he is not going outside. Love and Logic tell you to let the child make the decision and learn from it that way...natural consequences. That's all fine and dandy....when they are older but not at five. A five-year-old can't be expected to even remember that harsh lesson. They are simply not mature enough to learn from their mistakes the the first time.
2. And can I just vent for a second???? Well it IS my blog so here it is: Why do books advocate taking home the child who is in public having a temper tantrum???? I don't get it! When James did that, I would  a.) ignore it or b.) talk to him and let him know that his behavior would not be tolerated. I NEVER let his behavior prevent me from getting my groceries or eating dinner out. Why give a child that kind of power???? There is a c). Chris gives him a "talk". (I don't know what is said but it works. I've seen my brother-in-law do this with my nephew too. Very enigmatic.) Chris and I have taught him how we expect him to behave in public. Ok. I'm done.
3. An inspirational book I have been reading is called Boys Should be Boys: 7 Secrets to Raising Healthy Sons. The most precious thing I have learned is that boys James' age will easily accept and believe in God. This is a critical time in his life in which I should be instilling my values and his father's values now. While we don't go to church, we talk about God, I have added devotions to our lessons and we pray. Our lives are too hectic and I feel guilty that church is being put on hold. Being at church as a little girl is something I still remember. It helped to develop my character and who I am too. I really want that for James. I think I may have to come to a point where I simply will not work on Sundays so that I have the energy to get up and go to church and also have time for rest and time with family. Perhaps I just found my New Year's Resolution. 
4. James will tell me NO for just about everything I ask him to do (he doesn't get away with it though) and then, on a new day, he will latch on to me like a monkey and say he wants to hug me for 1,080 years. It's always 1,080 and I have no idea why. Whether he is talking about percent as in, "I love you a thousand and eighty percent" or going to time out, "Do I have to stay in my room for a thousand and eighty days???". 

Family

1. I have recently felt very grateful for my mother and all she does for me. She helps my sister and I quite a bit and rarely, if ever, says no to a request. I have been working extra hours and she has been really wonderful in letting James spend the night on short notice. It's good that he likes going over there too. Too often the relationships of mothers and daughters can seem complicated but it doesn't have to be.
2. This Thanksgiving I realized that I love the traditions that are being created as an adult at my parent's house. After dinner, me, my sister and my Mom are left at the table to talk. We talk and talk until something breaks the spell. This Thanksgiving, it was my Mom tipping over her crystal goblet and it shattered all over the table. :) It was kinda funny. James and my nephew chase each other through the kitchen and into the den over and over again. My Dad tickles James relentlessly...just like he did to me and my sister when we were little. 

I know I have forgotten some valuable observations and other significant thoughts but the clean laundry is piled up so high on my bed right now I won't be able to get the sheets on it later. It's been nice to take a few minutes to write. Granted I started this post about 2 hours ago. I ate lunch int he middle of it.  Then James came running in from outside to say he needed a coat and stole the strawberries that I was eating. He wanted enough for him and Regan (our neighbor) and two forks. Sigh. Smile.