The Force is STRONG with this One.

I am totally getting this t-shirt for James.

Raising a strong-willed child has been extremely exhausting these last couple of days. I have had to look for encouragement in my books and online and talking to my husband. And, ha ha, surprise to me, the strength of the will is something children are born with...it's NOT something they learn. I have always believed that all children have something inside of them that is solely their own. One can not interact with them and attribute their total personality to their parents. Yes, I know, James has adopted some of my vocabulary and mannerisms as well as his Dad's. But that kernel of himself that is solely his own is something I see every day. And I know one day I will LOVE his tenacity, his relentlessness in trying to get his own way for he will take that out into the world. And it will make him strong enough to handle anything that comes his way. But I don't love the tenacity at the moment. All that fight and unrelenting willfulness is directed at me! And THEN I learn that according to Dr. James Dobson, "the temperaments of the child reflect those of the parents"! What??? I was a well-behaved kid and...oh wait. I remember something.

 There was this time in 3rd grade. We were supposed to be good so that we earned NO points in class for talking or whatever. I got 23 points one time. In one week! We were supposed to aim for the "Golden Apple Award". I didn't get it that week. Just sayin'. I started racking up points pretty early in the week so I decided, "Well, there is absolutely NO chance of winning now so I am going to do what I like. You know, have fun. Throw caution to the wind. What I ended up with was a call to my parents and a trip to the psychologist. For testing. Guess I tested fine because I went back to 3rd grade and everything was fine. I eventually got that dang Golden Apple too. Got my picture took with the Principal. (That's how people say it in the South...we have our "picture took"). And...

There was this time in 6th grade. This boy (yes a boy!) kept harassing me and I was fed up one day. So while we were in the cafeteria for lunch, I told him to meet me outside when he was done eating. That didn't amount to anything. My teacher overheard me. She called my Mom too. And then...

Even later on in life, like in graduate school, I got called into the Director's office for a meeting. She had her yellow legal pad out when I arrived. I knew I was in trouble. I wanted answers from a professor that was not communicating...at all! It was so infuriating. She preferred teaching via the Socratic method and that didn't really fit my needs so I sent her an email. Annnddddd she forwarded it to the Director. 'Nough said about that. I was remorseful and apologized. In person.

Ok, I'm sensing a pattern here. And I don't even know all the stories Chris could tell!!! Geez Louise. James is definitely getting his temperament from both sides. I love to share the blame so I will gladly share this with Chris!!!

But! In my own defense, when boys weren't harassing me and what not, I was defending the new pretty girl in high school against older and pretty (and jealous) girls in said high school. I defended my sister against any foe because I was the only one who could be mean to her! Not you! (figurative "you". Not you who might be reading this right now). The BIG point to all of this is that I questioned authority and I wasn't afraid to do it. I have always had that confidence. Perhaps that is my strong will showing itself. I have always been fearless about confrontations, telling the truth bluntly whether it is something lovely or hard to take. I kind of don't have a hard time saying what I want neither. No comments from the peanut gallery necessary.

I DO have a mini-me...on the inside! James is seeking his own way. He is fighting for independence and power over ANYTHING in his life. It's probably why he eats about a handful of things. Oh he's polite about it, "No thanks", he says when we ask him to try something new. And he's only FIVE! Holy cow! I  have to learn to take it in stride or I will go insane and I will take James with me. I do not want to crush his spirit but I need to direct it to positive means and challenge his mind. Without that, I'm in trouble! So, I implemented a new chart yesterday that I got from Dr. James Dobson's book The New Strong-willed Child. Here's what it looks like:

                                               

 I had to change a couple of the "attitudes to make it fit our needs. "Sister" is now "school" and "Friends" is now "dinnertime".

It's working. James needs that structure. A goal. And I scoured the internet for fun family things that we can do as a reward. He liked a lot of it. Some of it costs money but maybe 1/2 of the list were things we could do at home for free or cheaply. Things like:

• Have a family car wash
• Experience the Night - bring chairs outside at sunset to listen/observe creatures of the night
• Backyard camp out
• Game Night- board games, cards, Wii
• Cake bake off
• Go to Frankies
• Bowling Night
• Campfire Cook out
• Reading Out Loud Night (Alex Rider series, Where the red fern grows)
• Fly kites

As I am wrapping up this post (Tuesday, 6/4/2013), things are much better. We got out of the house today. We went to the park and had some great quality time together. We observed bugs (even though I got mad when he stomped one) and smelled the magnolias and tasted the sweet nectar from the honeysuckle bushes. He insisted we hold hands for half the time. I love my boy and I am so glad he is tenacious. I really and truly am!

Bits and Pieces

There is so much going on right now and I want to document it all so today's post is is formatted in my ever-favorite bullet points. I'm sure not to forget anything when I can think within a list.

• James just completed the Math-U-See Primer. I am not sure if I want to go ahead and buy the Alpha level yet. Until I figure it out, I am printing out worksheets on www.education.com and using those to review and continue learning. James likes mazes so I am printing those plus worksheets for subtraction and telling time. If he progresses well, I will start looking for worksheets on money.
• I absolutely LOVE the All About Reading reading program! I had to buy the Level 1 since James completed the pre-reading level in February. He is continuing to learn the sounds of letters but when he reads them, he tried to guess the word without looking at the individual letters. He does the same thing with math. He tries to figure out the word based on his own knowledge instead of reading the word. He reminds me everyday to color in a star on his progress chart. :)
• Our co-op semester is coming to an end tomorrow. It's been a great year! James has made some really great friends...and so have I. It went by so fast this semester and we will miss seeing our friends every Friday.
• I have taken the bull by the horns and planned my first field trip. We are going to the Morehead Planetarium & Science Center next month. We will being seeing two Planetarium shows: Earth, Moon & Sun and Solar System Odyssey. During our co-op this semester, James was taking an Outerspace class and I thought this would be a great time to go. I still remember visiting the plantetarium when I was in school. This will be James' first trip to the Planetarium.
• No Tech Tuesdays are back!!!! Since discovering Minecraft, James has been obsessed with playing it and watching the Youtube videos of guys who SHOW you how to play it. He has actually spent more time watching the videos and learning about playing than actually playing it. Soooooo, he needed to take a real break from screens. This past Tuesday was our first one and it was the BEST day. We talked more, read more books and had a very nice day. I think it's very freeing to be without the entertainment of the computer, TV  phone and make your own entertainment. He wanted me to read to him ALL the Shutterfly vacation books I have made (there are 6 of them). He ran around the house pretending to be someone. I wasn't sure who exactly. He could have been a Transformer or a Minecraft character. But what I do know is that he was having fun!! He also says "I love you" more.
• The Action Bible is still a HUGE hit! James enjoys storytime every night with Daddy. He grabs his Action Bible and they read. They were reading about Sampson this week. I think James liked that story. The best part is that James is comprehending and remembering the stories. We reading a story last week and Passover was mentioned and I asked him if he remembered what Passover was and he responded, "It's when the Angel of Death came. The people put blood on their door so the Angel would not take their first born.". Wow!!! 
• Minecraft! Nana and Pop-Pop bought the Minecraft gift card as an Easter gift. He LOVED it! Now he is playing more than watching. I like that. Is Minecraft the Ultimate Education Tool?
• With our schedules being so hectic right  now, James is spending a lot of time with Chris at work. He goes with him to make deliveries. James loves being with his Dad. He also spends some time with MawMaw & DiDi each week as well. I don't know what we would do without my parents willingness to help us out on the super busy days. 
• We have made all sorts of friends this semester. Lots of play days at the park, birthday party invitations, and soccer is back in full swing too. We have field day to look forward to and trips to the beach. We get so busy with the day to day schedule that we are ALL looking forward to some family time away from the daily grind. 

Happy Springtime!!! It's here!

Strawberries! Strawberries! Pick your own fun!

 Chris, James and I went on a field trip with some other homeschoolers this past Monday morning. We went to a local farm called Vollmer Farm that opens their farm to the public so folks can pick their own strawberries. And right now in NC, the strawberries are perfect for picking! In fact, May is strawberry month. It didn't take us long to fill a 5 pound bucket full of delicious Sweet Charlie strawberries. If you are in North Carolina, check out www,ncstrawberry.com to find a farm near you. And if you are not at your computer, there's an app for that (for iphone only)! Look up "North Carolina Strawberry Farm Locator". And if you are so inclined, you can "like" them on Facebook at NC Strawberry. Heck! While you are at it, "like" Carolina Strawberry Festival, Wallace! The festival is happening on May 14th, 2012. We just might have to plan another field trip!

While we were at the farm's store, I grabbed a pamphlet about strawberries. It included recipes and I decided to try the Strawberry Bread recipe. It's in the oven right now! I took the liberty (I usually do) of adding some slivered almonds to my bread. I love nuts in bread and I just happened to have some. I mixed them with the dry ingredients right before I added the wet ingredients and mixed it all together. James even helped me put all the dry ingredients in the bowl. He couldn't believe that I was making strawberry bread for the first time! Ha! Now let's just cross our fingers that he will actually taste a bite. Happy picking!